Children and Young People

What therapy with a young person actually looks like

Most parents arrive with the same worry, and almost nobody says it out loud straight away: am I overreacting, or have I left this too late?

Usually neither. Usually you have noticed something real and sat with it for a while, hoping it would pass, and it has not.

It rarely looks like talking

Adults come to therapy and talk. Young people mostly do not, and a session built around expecting them to is a session that fails.

So the work looks different. With a younger child it might be sandtray, where what cannot be said gets arranged in a tray of sand instead, and tells you a great deal. It might be drawing, or a game, or talking sideways about a character in something they watch. With a teenager it is often closer to conversation, but on their terms, in their language, and frequently about something that appears to be nothing at all until you notice it is about everything.

None of this is filler while we wait for the real therapy to start. It is the therapy.

What you will and will not be told

This is the part parents find hardest, and I would rather be straightforward about it.

Your child needs to know that what they say in the room is largely private, or they will not say anything worth saying. So I will not give you a transcript of the session. What I will do is talk with you about themes, about how the work is going, and about anything you need to know to support them at home.

The limit is safety. If I believe your child or someone else is at risk of serious harm, I will act on that, and wherever it is safe and possible to do so I will tell them and you first. That is set out properly in my policies, and I go through it with young people at the start in words that make sense to them.

What helps before the first session

Tell them the truth about what it is. Not a treat, not a punishment, not a consequence of something they did wrong. A room where they can say things and nobody will be upset with them.

Let them have some say in it if you can. A young person who has been marched to therapy tends to sit with their arms folded for three sessions, and that is a fair response to having no say.

And try not to ask how it went in the car afterwards. The pressure of that question is enormous. Ask about something else entirely, and let them tell you when they want to.

My training in this area

I have completed the Level 5 certificate in counselling children and young people, and I am continuing onto Level 6, which runs through to summer 2027. Alongside that I hold Safeguarding Level 3, and specialist training in sandtray and in adoption. I have worked with young people across charity, GP and private settings for a long time now.

I also have specialist training in EMDR for Children and Young People.

If you are wondering whether it is the right moment, you are welcome to email and ask. I would rather have a five minute conversation with a parent who turns out not to need me than have you wait another six months.